My dad spent 13 years in prison. He’s not in jail anymore and nobody really knows what he’s up to.
Very seldom do I think about my dad but lately as I’ve had many conversations about me as a father I can’t help but think about him. At 18 years old with two more years to serve I went to see my dad by myself. His English isn’t that good so before I went I wrote my thoughts and feelings about him in Spanish.
I can’t remember everything I told him but it was something to the extent of how hurt I was for not having him around. Being an athlete at a young age I would see my friends with their dads; I would catch myself and ask what that game would have been like if my dad was there. Since that day I’ve only saw him two more times.
As I got older that silent anger I had toward him turned into pity. I came to understand that he was incapable of being a father. It wasn’t in him to truly commit to the act of becoming a dad. Anyone can be a father but it takes someone special to be a dad.
As I said the other day it’s not like me to get all sappy but thinking and talking about Liam gets me that way. Today marks exactly one week since Liam was born.
In my mind I’ve already had conversations about how I’m going give him a prep talk before all his games and how much I’m going to yell and cheer for the whole team. And most importantly the million times I’m going to hug and kiss him and tell him how much I love him.
Being a dad is the greatest gift I’ve ever received.
P.S. I have at least 1,000 kisses in so far.